Terry Bullman

I didn’t get here by playing it safe. My background is rooted in fighting, discipline, and putting myself in environments that force growth. Over time, that evolved into something deeper. Understanding how the mind works, how the body holds stress, and how most people are operating far below what they’re capable of.Like a lot of people, I’ve had to face my own patterns. Ego. Distraction. Avoidance. The things that quietly hold you back if you don’t deal with them.What I’ve learned is simple.You don’t change your life by thinking about it.

You change it by doing hard things consistently and telling yourself the truth.Now my work is about helping others do the same. Whether that’s through breathwork, retreats, or coaching, the goal is always the same. Get clear. Build discipline. Move forward.

You write that most men don’t lose their way all at once, it’s a slow drift.
When you look back at your own life, what was the moment you realized you were drifting, and what did that feel like internally?

I think for me, I realized I was drifting from the man I wanted to be and the man I wanted to become when I saw myself headed in the same direction as a lot of the men around me. Feeling like I was doing “good enough.” I was making okay money, I enjoyed my job, I had a good relationship with my kids, etc., but something just felt lacking or incomplete. Like, is this really what it’s all about?

You made a bold move leaving the U.S. for Costa Rica.
Was that decision driven more by clarity or by discomfort, and what did that transition strip away that comfort had been hiding?

I would say at first I didn’t feel like I had much of a choice. Because of COVID, I had to make a decision. And as much as I loved my gyms and my life in Tennessee, I never felt the same in my body and soul as I did in Costa Rica. I had been hiding for years behind staying busy and conquering the next thing. Here, I learned to be comfortable in the stillness.

The idea of “the war within” is powerful.
What does that war actually look like on an average Tuesday, not in theory, but in real life?

This daily war starts as soon as the eyes open in the morning. The stories we start to tell ourselves about how well or poorly we slept, what our body feels like, and our projection of what the day holds or what will unfold. And all of that happens before we even have the internal battle about whether we have time to stretch, go for a walk, or get to the gym.

You talk about alignment between values and actions.
What’s one daily habit you believe reveals more about a man than anything he says about himself?

His discipline. Whether it’s the morning practice, going to the gym, or making his bed. If he makes a commitment to himself or others, he follows through.

Gratitude is often seen as soft, yet you position it as a strength.
How did your relationship with gratitude evolve from something abstract into something operational in your life?

I started my gratitude practice when we introduced the morning practice as part of the Balanced Man Retreat. I was supposed to be meditating, but I found it hard to just sit and not think. So I turned it into an opportunity to start verbalizing internally all the things that I am grateful for. And the list just keeps going. It made me realize just how blessed I truly am. When you start your day this way, it’s hard to have a bad one.

There’s a constant tension between ambition and surrender in your work.
How do you personally know when to push harder, and when to let go?

Typically, I’ve learned it’s when I feel resistance doing something, whether it’s a business deal, a sale, or any kind of project, I ask myself, “Why am I doing this?” Is this about ego or a greater cause? Is this the usual amount of adversity, or is God trying to send me a message? Does this really need to happen now? This usually sets the tone for the level of determination I approach things with.

You’ve built businesses, trained physically, and led men’s retreats.
Which of those arenas has been the most confronting for you personally, and why?

Definitely leading the men’s retreats. In the other arenas, I was typically operating from a position of knowledge or power. With the retreats, I feel like I’m a participant who is learning and growing right alongside the men I’m supposed to be leading.

Ego versus humility is a theme many men struggle to balance.
Have you found a way to measure when ego is leading versus when it’s serving you?

I personally get clarity on things when I do breathwork. The breath puts me in a state where I can truly listen to the answers inside me and be honest with myself.
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The book is a 30-day field manual.
What is one challenge in the book that tends to create the biggest breakthrough, or resistance, for men?

I would say creating the Manifesto. Most men think they want things, a new car, a new relationship, or more money, but until they write it down and get clear and specific about what it is and why they want it, for most men it never evolves into reality.

1If a man finishes your book and does nothing else…
What is the one shift in thinking or behavior you hope stays with him long after the 30 days are over?

That they are the architects of their life. They have more control than they realize. They get to, and have to, choose between the light and the dark in every moment of every day.

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Website: https://www.terrybullman.com/
Instagram: ​https://www.instagram.com/thebalancedman.life/

Purchase the book here: 
https://www.amazon.com/Balanced-Man-Manual-Winning-Within/dp/1968668187/